Becoming Unstuck


There’s a great quote about getting unstuck by Pema Chodron. “We don’t hear hear much about how painful it is to go from being completely stuck to becoming unstuck. The process of becoming unstuck requires tremendous bravery, because basically we are completely changing our way of perceiving reality, like changing your DNA."

Or, as Tracy Jordan once said on 30Rock, "Stop eating people's old French fries, pigeon. Have some self respect! Don't you know you can fly?”

I think we frequently forget we can fly. HANG ON, I don’t mean literally fly, step back from the ledge there, mister. I mean we forget we’re heroes and souls and beautiful memories and inspired ideas and we’re not just this lump of collagen layered over calcium deposits holding in a bunch of water and other stuff. (I got a degree in the human body and paid a lot of money to know that level of detail so I don’t expect you to retain all of this.)

In These Great United States Of The Americas, we focus so much attention on the outsides. Flabby arms? We have a video of entertainingly fit people you can watch and hate yourself for that will surely fix that flabby arms if you could only just Do These Imposible Exercises Every Day! Baggy under eyeball puffiness? (How are these two things able to coexist, I’m not sure, but I tend to have both at the same time.) There’s a surgery for puffy, baggy eye skin! Want to lose that belly? Take this pill that makes you pee out your butthole and maybe stop wearing white and select dark pants for the duration of the program. Success Guaranteed!

We sell ourselves misery shaped items to fill all the misery shaped holes in our lives. They come in a lot of shapes and sizes but the misery shaped hole expands and grows and the misery-plugs stop working so we look for more Stuff.

Being brave isn’t easy. I know that seems obvious, but it isn’t. It isn’t to me, at least. I somehow manage to forget how tight my chest gets just before I do the Scary Next Thing. I forget how Big and Loud the Past Failures are. It catches my breath every time when I think about changing the Stuck. And then I find other souls also shifting in their world, also changing their Stuck, and we talk in a book store or a coffee shop and we find a community of Scared and Sacred for a little moment. We might even send a reminder or two, as we stumble upon them, reading others who have bravely shared their Shifting experience.

"Brave is not something you should wait to feel. Brave is a decision. It is a decision that compassion is more important than fear, than fitting in, than following the crowd.” ― Glennon Doyle Melton

We have the power to fly. Or we have the power to fall. I’d like to argue that both are legitimate uses of our energy. As a wise goose said to me recently, "Falling is just another way of floating, and then you will land on firmness below.” Shifting is just motion to an unknown space and unknown spaces are the best new landscapes to explore. It seems like a very good time to quote my favorite explorer, The Doctor, "The universe is big. It's vast and complicated and ridiculous. And sometimes—very rarely—impossible things just happen and we call them miracles.”

Shifting is a miracle. Being unstuck is a miracle. Changing your entire expectation of how Things Will Turn Out is a brave, scary, hard, beautiful miracle. You will want to take companions on your journey. You will need snacks and magazines. You will want to queue up your playlist for when Scary gets loud and needs to be drowned out with Love Notes. Also, don’t forget a towel.

"IN THE END… We only regret the chances we didn’t take, the relationships we were afraid to have,and the decisions we waited too long to make.” -Lewis Carroll.

We only regret the decisions we make out of fear.

It’s time to yell at Fear to have some self respect and go find its own french fries. These potatoes are yours. Grab ‘em to go because you’ve got things to do. Come along, then.

*For you, you know who you are. And by You, I mean Me. And also You.