My 7yr old knows more about pregnancy than I did at 29


Dear Buddy,

Tonight you blew our minds with your ability to spell an entire birthday card for your teacher and read your Dinosaur book without needing much help. You practically outdid most of my previous freshman college students with your math test and ability to speak adverbs properly. So yea, we’re sort of expecting great things from you.

We chose a book called “The Human Body” to read tonight. To be honest, you couldn’t decide between that, the airplane book and another dinosaur book but Mama can’t take another book about the big ass lizards, and was way too tired to feign interest over airplanes, so Human Body it was!

We flipped through some of the pages and landed on the pregnancy page. You started asking questions about the babies in the pictures. While I read you absorbed everything and formed ideas.

“At five weeks a fetus is the size of a bean, and heart, lungs, and organs are developing. The baby gets its nutrients from the mother through the umbilical chord.”

You interrupt with some facts: “So, basically, that baby is the size of a bean? Well, that tube there keeps it from getting lost so it won’t run away.”

“No, Bud, that’s how the baby gets its nutrition. That’s how its attached to the mom so it can grow.”

“Well, yea, but it’s really small and if it got lost, you’d never find it. Plus, did you know a baby Koala is like this big….” You hold up your fingers showing me the size a baby Koala is. It looks astonishingly the same size as a bean. “Yea, they can scream. Don’t even touch a baby Koala because they screech a higher pitch than Lauren.”

You rolled your eyes with an, “I dare you because I’ll totally say ‘I told you so.’”

“Wow, Bud, you know a lot of interesting facts!”

“Yea, well, basically I just remember everything I hear. Did you know your jaw bone is called a Patella?”

Your eyes got droopy, and your fingers instinctively rush to rub away the sleepy tears. “Hu, are you sure?” I asked as I covered you with the blanket. You were sure, very sure. In fact, you were so sure, it was either your mouth or the side of your skull that you laid your head down on the pillow to prove a point.

And promptly fell asleep.

I’ll tell you about your kneecap tomorrow. Tonight, rest that Patella on the pillow and dream of tiny animals.

With love,

Posted: 5/6/2014

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